Among my mom’s many mildly annoying sayings was “Well, this counts for eatin’.” I was never sure what it meant, whether she hadn’t really enjoyed the meal or she really had. Or maybe that she wasn’t hungry but felt obligated to eat. Or maybe it referred to something specific the first time and she enjoyed saying it so much she just kept doing it. If all the annoying habits of my family could be charted on a huge tree there’d be a dotted line running from “Well, this counts for eatin’” to her mother-in-law’s standby, “I wonder what the poor people are eatin’ tonight.” I believe that was meant to be a compliment to the cook.
Saturday night I saluted the end of Lent with a cold glass of sake at Katsu, where Dave and I went with Xeena and Buck. Usually we meet at our old standby, Midori, but we decided to try somewhere new because there are a million restaurants in Chicago, for Pete’s sake. We agreed that the quality of the sushi at Katsu may be superior, but we enjoy Midori more. Not just because it’s cheaper, though that helps, but we’ve gone there together enough that it feels like ours. I crave my favorite rolls there, and the margaritas, and the familiar faces.
At the table, Xeena said she misses ritual. “Holidays come and go,” she said. For Easter they were having her family over for barbequed fish tacos.
“I thought we were going to try going to church sometimes,” I reminded her. We had talked about it maybe a year ago, on a Sunday morning when we were all at Ann Sather, how we could check out churches of different denominations around town.
“We were,” Xeena agreed. She asked Dave and Buck, “You guys interested?” Buck stared blankly ahead, just as he did when she mentioned it at Ann Sather. She added quickly, “We could go to brunch afterward.”
Dave replied in the same words he used the first time, “Couldn’t we just go to brunch?”
Our Easter dinner was mostly traditional. Ham at my brother Rolando’s. They also served eggplant parmesan for the vegetarians, and many side dishes. I laughed more than I have in weeks, sitting with my brothers and their wives and their kids and Dave and cousin El, who’s more like a sister. El made two lamb cakes, just like last year, and this year both their heads stayed on. However, one lamb fell face forward into the green coconut grass, so it seemed to be sniffing the other lamb’s butt. Also, the upright lamb’s ear fell off so she re-attached it with a dental floss pick. She swore it was unused.
After just a few years of El bringing two cakes instead of one, I now expect two. The first time she was trying to make up for her ugly homemade one with a bakery one, which froze and shrunk in the car so it actually looked worse than the homemade one. Last year she made two recipes, pound cake and chocolate zucchini. This year they were both pound cake, the difference being that the upright one with the dental floss pick ear had white frosting while the toppled-over one had white frosting plus a layer of coconut flakes. I’m not sure how many years it takes for a pattern to become a ritual, but there’s a little place in my heart now that longs for a pair of lamb cakes this day every year, ever striving for perfection, always failing in their own perfect way.
4 thoughts on “Counts for Easter”
will meet you for a non-denominational brunch! 🙂
reading this was the highlight of my day…thanks for sharing. i once had plans with a friend to visit a bunch of places of worship…you know…sit in the back, see if anything moved us…and then go to dinner. we went a few times. i felt like an interloper…but dinner after was always the best part. now we skip the first part and just go to dinner. it works, but around holidays i always feel a little tug of something from someplace i already know i don’t belong. it’s strange, but maybe a little bit reassuring in a way, if knowing where you don’t belong helps you feel more comfortable where you do belong? maybe? anyway…love the lamb cake…He is awesome.
So we’re not the only ones! I still want to try it. Especially if we can include the brunch part.
Awww … Sweet Mary. What a lovely post. Thank you for sharing. Lamb cakes can be ritual. So can fish tacos. On Easter morning, I was lamenting about the years past when we would hide Easter baskets and eggs for our daughter Danielle. Now that she’s in college, we obviously don’t do that anymore. But John put a funny spin on it saying, “Yea. Now we just hide the Scotch.” This made me laugh so hard I forgot about my nostalgic longings. And feel so grateful that I have a husband who still makes me laugh after all these years … and a friend like you who bears witness to both joy and sadness as we journey through life together. Love you, dear friend.